Continuation :D

So anyways, continuing my blog. So lately I've been getting irritable about Bictches, Freeloaders, Bossy People, and etc. I just wanted to blurt that out. But hm, what can I say about today? The tests were okay. Like it wasn't SUPER hard, but it wasn't easy. My brain didn't hurt, but I got annoyed when I couldn't really figure out some questions. I'm hoping I got a 5 on my english test! But the freaking reading-comprehension, and even the correction questions were hard for me today! Chemistry was the 2nd part. at first eveything was really hard, and I stressed. Then the second part I stopped stressing, and was just like "Well, since it's like this. it's probly gna be this." without really hcecking or reviewing. So I'm hoping they end up completely right, bkos I answered so quick. But most likely they might end up being Wrong, bkos I answered so quick.


Well Math and History tomarro. Most hardest ones D: I really should be studying, but I've been trynna study for history all day, my mind is tired and I can't cram math. I should really work on remembering the formulas for algebra 2. I need to get off aim.

So we have another test on thursday. Party on Friday. i still gta ask Henry if he wants to go. I wna go. but no ride there or home. ]: so how could I possibly go? Why on a fridaaaay? D: I wna go! I mees Nancy! And it's her 16th birthday! I hope I cannn.


So. I'm very hopefull lately. Will any of these hopes come true? Who knows. I'm hungry :D

Big Girl Now Now Now.

So I'm attempting no-heat hair styling. Today it his paper rolled bangs for volume. Braided.

So anyways, Blah testing today was alright. I'm get Raped by iMs. I will continue this later :D

Don't got rice in my pants!

So Today I went to community service! It was a good day for a tan, but no. I hadda wear jeans! So First I got there and sat in an "No longer than 5 mins" parking space for 10 mins with mommy. Couldn't find any of the people for community. Called Nhat tu. First time got a really really high squeeky voicemail in viet. Kinda scared me. Kinda caught me off gaurd. Kinda made mommy hit me in the head for saying "WUHT THE FUCK!?" LOL. Went with Nhat Tu, Walked around, met up with Henry. Made Posters to sell stuff with Dez. Sat down and was hyper for the first 15 mins. Henry wouldn't dance with me D: wasn't hyper anymore then. Then Henry will dance with me. -_- Met a little flip/viet boy? He had a crush on Henry :] Me and Henry snuck away into the zipper while the stand was busy. We were on top and we thought it was gna break down and we were gna die. Kissed before we thought the end was coming :D Not excatly my "fantasy" way of dying. o_o swaying slowly, really high, o_o kissing. LOL. Hmm, afterward went back to the stand.. studied bkos I'm a nerd. uhmmm. Theeeen thought of a little choreo. Made Henry do funny things :D Broke my dice necklace D: Fixed it! Went home at 5. Was tired. Continued trynna study. Got woken up by my fone, someone saying "AYEEE. YU HAVE RICE IN YOUR PAAANTSS?" LOL. I think It was my Friend Damion. He used to always say that. but man I haven't talked to him in so long, I'm not even sure. I don't think I remember his last name, bkos I somehow ended up with Damion Fuzz. o_o that's not right.

SO I'm eating healthy.. My jaw hurts from carrots! I don't understand why Annie thought the "hotdog fest" was free, or was at Henry's. o_o I don't understand why she looked forward to hotdog fest?

OHHHH SPEAKING OF THAT. It was actually shortened down to just Me, SMiley, Lorenz and Henry. it was pretty fun. We met up with Adrian, peed for a long time at the youth center, LOLOL jk! But then forced SMiley into teh zipper. SCREAMED OUR ASSES OFF. Went and Chilled at starbucks with Hot SO COH LAAA. Watched Adrian make funny faces and look like he was jacking off using his "ipod shuffly" or some sht. The one yu have to shake to switch songs. ROFL. Watching funny facial reactions to ppl passing by looking at him. Went back to fair. Went on the Fair-ess wheel. [ how the o.o do yu spell that?! ] WAS FREEZING COLD. WHEEL WENT HELLUH FAST! It was windy and cold and dark, and HIGH. Me and Henyr were freaking out, it was scarier than the zipper. Than we cuddled and made air hearts to random things. Adrian took 9348290348092 pictures. We went home. Saw the same episode of Hamtaro in Henry's car. Uhmm Uhmmm. Watched that 70's show in my nice warm pjs. Been loving teh night weather lately. Perfect to sleep in :)


Hmmm, well thats it! Tomarro is more community service. I think I might want to go the same time as Henry. So that I'm not wandering around lost of in illegal parking spaces. LOL. Annie says she's coming? I think I might tell her not to though. Bkos she wouldn't enjoy it at all really. She'd be pretty bored off her ass :D But oh well. We'll see. Might ditch a little early to go shopping with SHERRRIIIII. She asked. But idk.

So lately, .. hm. Asian man. o_o do I have any comments? Today and yesterday was so hooplah that it felt like it's been a week since the asian man incident. Trynna think of more routine. Got kinda slowed down int eh process. We're way behind schd. Need to record the steps and send them to people. THink my routine requires too much work. Demi's might be a little easier, if not asiany feminine. LOL.




SO, EATING VEGES. NO RICE IN MY PANTS! OH OH, and "HAA, you just emptied your bucket!" ROFL.

Missing Boyfriend.

Lol. Being the Dork that I am, I felt a need to connect the title "Dead Ex" With Me and Henry. So That's how I currently feel about Us. Lately. Haha. It feels like "Missing Boyfriend," to me. I counted the days that I've seen Henry this spring break!
Saturday - No. ]:
Sunday - Half, Somewhat, 1/3
Monday - Somewhat sorta, 1/4
Tuesday - No! ]: < / 3! Wednesday - Yesh! Thursday - YESH! Although.. ah nvm. lol Friday - No. ]: I Miss you Hunney! Saturday - .. Hm, So far He's told me he's going to a picnic? Miss You more ]: Sunday - Annie's probly gna come rape me or something. So there yu have it! 2 and.. uh 7/12! .. hm, I've been doing too much math lately. I Miss him so much, I really thought Spring Break would be Our Break together.. But anyways, I've been reading alot of "Dead Ex" Been trying to get into the reading mood. :D Simon + Wollie = Hot! LOL. Man, I hope Me and Henry get to be like that sometime in the future. I'm deffinately gna make sure he owns a suit in the future too. :) So, hm. What can I say? I curl my hair with Paper today! It came out very nicely, I attempted to do more hw which did not go well, and I think I really should finish it. Arg. Homework is so boring. How is it possible that I had all this free time today and I could not do homework? Well, I have a gross bubble on my mustache. Lol. I Miss Henry. ]: We haven't talked all day! ]: I want to, eat some really unhealthy food. Sit down, snuggle by a fire with a blanket and hot chocolate. Lay down with him, tell him I love him, how much I missed him today<3

RECAAAAAAP:
So that Reminds me! I really should recap on the recent activities! Wuht excatly did I do this spring break? I got to spend time with Cindy and Nancy! Oh I missed them so much! I still regretting not sleeping that day. LOL Omg Cindy, She is like an ANGEL! :] I'm glad I went with her that day instead of just moping at home. I'm such a crybaby sometimes! But anyways, I went on a shopping spree at eastridge with Cindy, it was fun. it was really nice to see her again :)
I bought a cardian! Only 3 bucks, ;D Jeans! 13 bucks! Purse 5 Bucks! :D And, Subway, 5 something? Cindy helped pay, she gave me a penny! LOL :D
It was really something I needed, and she showered me with so many gifts she PURCHASED for me ;D Like can yu believe it?! So Generous Cindy! :D LOL Oh man, Pliers. Is that how yu spell it? Hillarious times. She's an adorable evil genius in an angel's face! :D Well lets see, after that, I went to the library with Henry the next day, I enjoyed that day. I was dressed nice :D We kinda sorta recconnected with his family after a while, got good chocolate!
Note to Self: Chocolove xoxo Cherry Chocolate! Was it called Chocolove? BUY IT SHERRY BUY IT!
Then After, was our "date" lol. We watched Fast and Furious. And yunnoe wuht, HE WAS ACTUALLY WATCHING IT! LIKE, ALMOST GLUED EVEN! Cept for a couple times I finally was able to steal him away, for maybe 15 secs. Yea, Wuht is with guys and car movies? Cars Period? I just hope he won't turn out like the "*Drinks beer* Hold on Hunney, I'll do it after the insert sport team name here Wins! -_-
I don't think he's ever really been that into it. Idk. it didn't feel like a date, it kind of just felt like a day at his house, watching a movie, that I particularly liked, but would've much rather been with him. But maybe my expectations were just too high.. I Was hoping for a romantic evening, like the ones we used to have, but I think I thought it MUCH too high for reason. I guess I just wanted a little WOW-ing date before break was over.
So Then Today, Friday, he went to SF. I was way too lazy to go anywhere. I tried doing hw which was "epic fail" LOL and I curled my hair with paper! Pictures Below ! I posted them up oldest to newest, I dnt know why they somehow turned out Newest to Oldest.
Today was the first day pretty much all spring break that I decided to stay home and to myself, and My parents were bashing out at each other, and me, like they've been saving it up or something. Just my luck. Yay me.
Come back soon hunney<3

Spring 'break'.

Today was good. Haha. it was tirering. So Henry, the bestest cutie ever came to pick me up and walk me to the lightrail. Which I took forever to get ready, but still couldn't find anything to wear and ended up feeling really uncomfortable with how i looked. So right when we got to Target, the lightrail was coming. which was 10 mins away. So we raaaaan. trynna catch it. did not work -_- So hell, we went to jamba juice and got some to drink! Then I said bye, and I caught the lightrail to gmall to meet Nancy and Cindy.
Omg, I had a horrible sleep last night. I was SO tired. I wonder if yu could tell from my outfit? lol. I WAS SO TIRED. SERIOUSLY. I think today could've been so much funner if I wasn't so laaa. Man. I need to make it up to them! I Lovee Them Though! D: I can't believe I ruined a day!

To Cindy & Nancy; HI :D Lol. I just learned today they check up on me, reading my blog ever so often. :] how sweet!

So yea, i got a shirt, which I then wondered why I bought it, bkos mostly I wanted it to feel less crappy o_o I think I felt weird bkos my shoes didn't really match. I think I shoulda dressed my usual way instead trynna be different today. it was WAAAY too different. Cindy got me a mushroom candy thing and cute nail polish. She's super. LOL seriously. like a ninja, i didn't see her 'buy' it at all! :O Like. it was so quick, it was like she didn't even buy it! LOL *wink.


So I got home. Fell asleep right away. I was like knocked out. Have I ever been this tired? o_o

So Henry called after. He's not having very good family times. So there's no way I could possibly tell him bout tomarro. ]: I want him to go have fun with his friends. but yunnoe, It just makes me sad that we can't spend time together. ]:...

So lately, ever single break, we never really get to spend time together, and I've been pretending that really, it doesn't affect me much. it really really does. ]: Like really. it makes me so sad. bkos ever since school started every break, he's been far away, we haven't gotten to spend a DATE together in so long.. And every single time, it always ends. "This break was horrible. ]: I'm sorry I didn't get to spend time with yu." "it's okay! We still have ____ break." and then the break finally comes. and nothing.

So I'm sad.. bkos it's gna be one year and 2 months. 1 day of the month, that's during break too! And, he's going to spend it with his friends. ]: .. < / 3 .

But it's okay, it's been tough for him. So I want him to go have fun with his friends.

I don't think I'll be able to go out tomarrow though. I mean, honestly, I'm gonna be pretty bummed out tomarrow. And I'd rather not ruin another day for someone. So I'm just gonna stay home, catch up on some homework. Eat cookies and milk. watch movies..

]: ]: I know I should be happy that he gets to spend time with his friends. but omg. I'm so sad. ]: It's like, when yu feel like they have a chance to spend a day with you, a special day, but instead they pick something over it. I mean, I WANT him too. But that 25% sadness is still roaming in my head.. ]: ]: just kinda breaks my heart a little yunnoe? But I'm sure it'll be fine. We have thursday together.

That reminds me. He's going someone on Friday. another day i cannot spend with him. So today is Monday, let me tell yu wuht days I'm currently finally schd to see him; Thursday.

Yup. Thats it. Well, maybe summer vacation will be better.. :'[ ......... I actually feel like I want to cry, in fact I'm somewhat tearing! ROFL. This is so retarded. haha. I think I must still be tired or something, I don't know why I'm so sad.

I Love You Hunney<3 hehe. Have The Most Fun Ever Possible Tomarrow! :] <33333333

Shame.

So a recent event has shocked me into fear, and made me realize what a brat I am. I've never felt so disappointed and ashamed of myself in my whole life.

I have the best parents, in the world. Or at least I had. I was a horrible kid. Of course I locked myself into this corner, but I was still an average kid. I exaggerated of my childhood. Sure, I did feel left out and not favored. But my parents loved me.

They weren't around, but when they were I know now that they tried their damn hardest to take care of me. A couple from Vietnam, two kids, both did not go to college.

They loved me. My mom loved me, my dad loved me. I was his little girl. And over time. that all changed. I began to convince myself they didn't love me, just bkos we weren't like the families on t.v.. that ate together.

And I blame myself for how my family has turned out. Broken, fragile little pieces. I hate it

I'm putting this here not to have your sympathy. But to admit to yu now that I have the best parents in the world, who I love with all my heart, and they love me too.

They aren't "fkced up" they aren't anything. It's my fault for how things have ended up between us, they're great parents.

I've never in my life felt so ashamed of everything I've done. I'm a horrible person. I've disappointed my mom so much, and I know that. I'm a horrible, horrible person. I don't want to disappoint my mom ever. but sadly, I know I will.

I'm going to try my best to stop with the lies, exaggeration, dreams. That I myself, don't even know why I make it up. It's like I'm so caught up in this fairytale life, it's just not reality.

I just hope I'll be able to fix everything. I hope I'm going to be okay.
It is 12 o'clock in the morning. And I have never been so scared and worried in my whole life. I'm shaking. I wish so much Henry was here right now.... I need someone to tell me it's going to be okay..

"if this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?"


Don't Ask Me About This. I Beg You.

When you're not with me.

Well, today I hadda walk home. and like 30 mins after I got home, my mommy came home with no dad. -_- lol. She says she waited too long and hadda leave. So Basicly I hadda walk home for no reason! I'm not mad that I hadda walk, i mean it was actually a very nice time to walk. It was breezing yet warm. I'm just mad that my dad got us into trouble again. Without even being able to drive. Seriously, ugh.

So Anyways I got home, worried about some things, asked my mom about things. Lol. Awkward mother daughter conversations. I'm still hesistating to ask her if I can move next year to independence, incase Henry moves. Bkos really I don't know wuht I'd do at James Lick without Henry. There'd be that empty little feeling I had at the beggining of the year, when I had no classes with him, except it'd be, all the time. And I want to grow old with him. I don't want him to just end up as a high school Sweet Heart.

Yup, I don't really know wuht to say. I had a greaaaat time with Sheri :] my Beffie Weffie, and I'm starting to realize that the parts of the dance I thought up require a lot of emotion. So when I do them without really trying it just looks like chaoticly jumping around. I don't think I should think of choreography, i have ideas, but not good ones. o_o

So Help us. Insomnia - Craig Something o_o is our song, help us along! :D

Boundaries.

"Oh, I say!" "Honestly!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-987bQraGc
Seems like every week that I go to Henry's house, another rule is thought up. I mean, I'm really happy they allow me to be with me. I'm lucky, and I know that. I just feel in a way insulted with all these rules, bkos it feels kinda like they don't trust/like me. Or want me to be around Henry.

So far, we can not;
Hug and Kiss in front of them, or any kinda body contact except for holding hands.
We can not speak too cornily, or be too "lovey dovey" any time around them.
We can not close the door, anywhere we are. CAN NOT BE IN A ROOM PERIOD.
Can not lay down/sleep together.
Hafta stay downstairs when they can see us.

You know, I was getting used to all the rules, until they said we can not go upstairs to sleep. Now that one, ouch. Lol. Bkos at his house, when we are downstairs, it's really very distant between us. He talks to his brothers, tells them not to do stuff, his parents tell him to do stuff, he sits and watches t.v. I'm playing with any toys around talking to myself or him when he actually hears wuht I says and replies back.
I love being upstairs bkos we actually communicate upstairs and I actually feel like he's there as a boyfriend not just a friend.
When we sit downstairs, we can NEVER be alone. and omg. there's always little things keeping us from being together, period. FORGET ALONE. I WANT TOGETHER, AT LEAST. C'mon.

He can get mad about his brothers annoying him, and all I can do is sit and pat his back, trynna not to break a rule.

So next time they see us sleeping upstairs, they kick me out.

I don't really wanna go to his house anymore. If they're willing to kick me out then they'd rather not have me there at all.

Man,

So i'm talking to two people. And the coversation of death comes up. One's a little sad.


Makes me think, why would someone choose to DIE, given the chance? .. I'm just still really shooken......... Why does this conversation come up?


Antony. I miss you so much. It's been hard lately. R.I.P.....


Stay Happy Sherry. Stay Happy. Please try your best to be happy. Happy. I'm happy.

Antony, Oh Antony.

Well, maybe it's school but Once again after one day. It was not that great. And Well, somehow I found my old blogs that I wrote, and I read about you. Omg. Amazing how long I've put off remembering you. It STILL hurts, and I know it's never going to stop when I think about you. Until the day you magically come back, it won't stop. It seems like just a figment of my imagination now. I think I may start thinking about you tomarrow, I just hope I don't bring anyone else down with me. I don't like telling people whats wrong, especially not about this. I mean, how else can it go, I can't even type it. "One Of My Best Friends _____" and they'd say, "Omg, I'm so sorry to hear that.." What happens next? Nothing. You won't come back. I won't forget. And me just telling them just make it seem like I want attention. I don't want that. I just want, .. I just want to miss you sometimes. It hurts but it's better knowing, than forgetting. I don't want to forget bkos I don't want to take those memories for granted. I miss you. So much..


I'm going to change the subject, just so people won't think I'm slitting my wrist over here. I'm fine. :] just, a little sad reminiscing. I'm Fine.

So I'm wearing on bra's that are too small. LOL. Well, they probably fit me but I'm so picky with bras that they feel like they're too small. I'm trynna PERK THEM UP. LMFAO. I dnt think it's working, in fact I think They've shrunken a little. LOLOOL. Don't yu love reading my blog? See, I'm completely, utterly jittery and giggly and joyous! :]

So Anyways, I should really take off this bra and go do hw. But i'm so lazy. Maybe I'll just make my bigger sized bras fit smaller, instead of making my smaller size bras smaller. o_o Does wearing small bra's really give yu cancer? I thought they made your boobs perky! LOL.

So anyways again.
Henry, Henry, Henry. I'm sorry to say but over time we've somehow changed into "real love," I think real love is for the couple that can not handle stress and have grown accostomed to the comfort of their other, and then take it for granted. Which is what I'm doing. Not Henry, just me.

I keep getting tired of things easily, I'm impatient. I think I'm training myself to be more patient by keeping quiet instead of blowing up, but really, I'm not. Is patience dealing with it, or letting it go ?
Either way I can not do any of those. haha. I want to revert back to the "Puppy Love" Days. And I shall find a way! Will it work? Considering my impatience, most likely not. BUT I WILL TRY! :D


Sherry Small Bra is Out!



..R.I.P<3