"Not letting yourself see him again, because it hurts so much to see him with other people and enjoying himself, while you watch from afar to make sure he’s still doing fine. Looking after him even though you know you shouldn’t and making sacrifices for him even though you know that he doesn’t know. And that if he did know, it wouldn’t matter, thats true heartbreak.
The worst kind of heartbreak is letting someone you loved go, even though you weren’t finished loving them… and knowing that if you let them go they’ll be happier.."

...This is a lie! I'm just doing it because.. We're best friends, yeah, that's why. :D?... Yeah..

Boy oh Boy do I need to get this off my mind.

First of all, I feel like I should private this. How do I do that again? I feel really stupid having people read this. How do I make it un-followable?

Hm, where to start.
Boy, I Miss You.
I'm not saying I need you. I'm not saying my life is damn miserable without you, I'm not clinging to you because I feel that I have no one else.
I just really, really miss you. You. No other reason, just you.

What can I say?
I'm so happy that we're still good friends. I'm so happy that we can still talk on the phone and have a good time together.
But I don't know. Maybe this is just the "getting over you" talking.
I really miss that quality time we used to have. Where it seemed like there was nothing else going on in the world. Where I could just relax from everything.
It always seems like something is going on, homework, stress, friends, crowds.
Lately all I've really wanted was just some one on one time with you.
Not even as a couple. Ah. I don't know what I want.

I'm really confused.
But honestly, don't worry about me.
Don't feel this sudden urge to call because you think I want you to! Haha, silly boy.
I'm fine, honest. I'm not miserable or anything.
I just really miss you is all.
I just, needed to get that off my chest.

Gosh Darnit.

I'm sorry I missed all 4 of your calls )=
I really miss having a ringtone.
I feel really bad, and I really want to talk to you now!
Dang it, I won't be able to sleep like this.

Want to hear a secret?

I really miss my sweetheart..

EFFF THAT.

My chest is burning from this sensation, saying, "Sherry, choose now."
And gosh darnit. I chose wrong, just to find out I was a tool of company.
Just to listen to your bragging, and laughter, and abrupt "Cya!"
Shoulda listened to my sign.
From now on, I gotta start listening to my luck.

It's all good it's all good.
Just keep it coming, please.
Keep more coming, spit it out in huge amounts.
Making it all the easier for me.

I got this, I got this. I'm winning this playing field, jumping right up from your stabs.
I. Got. This. =)

The way I see it.

I feel things are unfinished.
But as the days go on and on, I am in fact letting you go by the day.

I was scared to let you go, scared that if I did, you'd be gone forever.

I see now, that if I chose to let you go, but you chose to stay there,
then it'd really be best if we did just go our separate ways.
I don't want the only reason for you staying, is because I'm holding on to you.

The signs were so clear. More signs as days continue to pass.
I just couldn't accept what was happening.
I didn't want to accept it. I wanted you, my first love.

In the past, I would've said something like, "I'm going to try to let you go, even though I will fail and fail, I will keep trying."
I think, deep down; I just didn't want to let you go.

It saddens me that nearly 2 years would end up like this.
We ended, on unfinished terms. But unlike the rest, we are at least friends. So I guess we're lucky.
Perhaps I was just sad that nearly 2 years had to end at all.

Well, there's really nothing left to say.
I am going to let you go,
It will take time,
it will take a lot.
But I will let you go, completely.

I will miss you though.

My Life is average

Honestly I’ve just been at a standstill.
Life seems to just float by my fingers.

I find that Spanish seems to be the funnest class lately, and I recall at the beginning of the year, hating it with a fiery intensity.
I absolutely positively hate precal class though.

On my schooldays, I look forward to the weekend, badminton practice, and showering with my yummy Shampoo.

I think I might’ve made Varsity for badminton.
But then again, I really don’t think I’m ready for it.
It’s only the first year, and I could be so much better.
We’ll see what happens tomorrow.

My life could be better,
But it could also be worse.

I’m having one of those “no motivation” periods.
They’ll just fly by though, I’ll be over it soon. =)
Just keeping my head up in the clouds until then.

I love the way it feels when you touch my hand
Don't wanna let you go
I love the way you say that I am your man
Don't understand why we can't go on and go on
Don't understand why
You don't belong in my arms

Ohh

And even if I cried a thousand tears tonight
Would you come back to me
And even if I walked on the water
Would you come out to sea
Now I can't spend my life standing by
Cause even when I miss you
You're still not missing me

It's funny how my heart just won't let it go
I just don't understand
It's crazy how the pain seems to overflow
The memories of you here with me by my side
I can't deny that you are the love of my life

Ohh

And even if I cried a thousand tears tonight
Would you come back to me
And even if I walked on the water
Would you come out to sea
Now I can't spend my life standing by
Cause even when I miss you
You're still not missing me

And I still cry for you
And I would die for you
I can't believe all the words I heard you say
And I still long for you
And I was strong for you
I can't believe that you'd throw it all away

I still cry for you
I would die for you
I can't believe all the words I heard you say
I still long for you
I was strong for you
I can't believe that you'd throw it all away

And even if I cried a thousand tears tonight
Would you come back to me
And even if I walked on the water
Would you come out to sea
Now I can't spend my life standing by
Cause even when I miss you
You're still not missing me

I still cry for you
I would die for you
I can't believe all the words I heard you say
I still long for you
I was strong for you
I can't believe that you'd throw it all away

Now I can't spend my life standing by
Cause even when I miss you
You're still not missing me

Why, WHY DO I WANT TO TALK TO YOU SO MUCH?!

Not even about what just happened.
I JUST WANT TO TALK TO YOU.

AND I HATE IT.
I HATE IT I HATE IT.

I. DON'T. WANT. TO. MISS. YOU. ANYMORE.
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I hate that I can't finish even one conversation with you.

What are you so afraid of? People thinking the wrong thing?
Let them think.
You can smile and shake it off.
Why would it matter, if you actually really did want it?

Tell me why.
Why do you feel this urge to hide everything?
You don't want to hug me in public, why?
Because you don't want people to think the wrong thing?
The wrong thing, is us getting back together, or liking each other.
Why does it matter to you who knows..

You treat me like this person, you'd only love in private.
In front of other people, I am the farthest from your mind.

Why can't you just be honest.
Damn. You are so confusing.

Just stop it. Just. Stop.

I Hate this, to a full extent. I just want summer vacation already.
Where I'll go to Vietnam for the summer, and you won't have to hear or see me ever again.
I'm sorry for embarrassing you.

What I want to say is that I miss you everyday.