Ehh.

Well, today was a good day, until thoughts filled my head and then we ended up talking about those thoughts. Yu see, I was trynna get away from it, bkos thinking about it made me disappointed. But, the conversation went on about it, untill I reached my house. Ending the very good day, with a not so good conversation.

So yeah, Henry can NOT be that "best friend" I have every year. Bkos I can't really talk to him as a FRIEND, he's a comforter, bkos he's my boyfriend. And I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't need him to change INTO my best friend. I need, a best friend.

But yeah, continuing on with this conversation. It was about the dance. Which i LOVED that we did, and I'm soooo proud of it. But like, I did so much work, but the behind the scenes work. Aka : Where we stand, how we transition, the transition dance moves, and editing the music. All, were like super awesome and everything, but like, I didn't really feel appreciated. For it, at ALL. The whole time we did like the practice, I hadda ask them to get it together, so we could practice. and everytime I thought of wuht we should do for it, I realized, I never got a "WOAH, THAT IS HELLUH SICK! WE SHOULD DO THAT" thing, like for the other parts. Which is ironic, bkos the part they didn't really appreciate, was the part everyone went crazy for. I also did, like THE WHOLE SONG. By myself. Editing it, picking the parts to go into the middle, in fact, I even suggested the songs, and they agreed. Yet, I didn't hear like one "Thank you" or "good job" unless you count. "Oh yeah, we can dance to that! Its cool."

But yea, I felt underappreciated. I didn't even really feel like I got much credit for anything I did. I felt like the boring one of the dance, who didn't really shine at all. I just wished we coulda done more feel dancing. The dancing that is fun.


Next year, I don't want to like see them fail at the dance if I don't join. I just want them to kinda see how much work I tried to put into it.

I wish I hadn't done alla that, to watch it, and wish I coulda have some more dancing that I enjoy.


Lol, I'm ranting. but its okay. I liked our dance all in all. I kinda feel like I get pushed around and step on this year. Like I'm something to push to the side. I don't like that. I actually don't think this has really happened before. Everything seemed to have changed. All from one thing.


Eh, wuht can I say? I miss when it wasn't so lonely. :] Well, don't mind me. I'm just ranting like the child that I am. I tend not to realize the important things I have. Or appreciate it. Like Henry for example, it may not always be a happy relationship. But it's the perfect one for me. Perfection, is a tolerable, joyfull form of imperfection.



I love you hunney bunch.<3